Week 11

Well dear Reader,

The countdown is officially off. At least this countdown. Like every event in the last year that has been planned, this one has been postponed which I guess is good news for us since our progress was a little lackluster and another year will make a world of difference.

In saying that, we have been making changes since last we spoke. I have been intermittent fasting for the last month and while I am seeing a slight decline, there are definitely other benefits I have seen so far.

Lockdown has also given me a great opportunity to reflect. To think about what my life looks like now and where I would like to go with it.

My first epiphany is how I can’t believe my perception is so incredibly far from the truth. I remember thinking for years how I was fat when looking back at pictures I was very clearly in some cases incredibly fit. If I even think of my journey since starting this blog, there has been at least 8kgs gained since my first post and while I know at this stage in my life I am fat, my perception of how I am from 8kgs ago to now is no different.

Does anyone else have that problem? Is it just a me thing?

Secondly, I am starting to really engage with this idea of what my life looks like. I am getting older, a ripe 31 years old. No kids. No marriage. No house. A career I thought would be short term. At this stage in my life, I wouldn’t change anything except the fact that most of my time is spent eating, sleeping and working with a little watching TV. The excitement has dissipated. I no longer have a life that feels spontaneous or like anything can happen, and that scares me more than getting old.

So like every post over the last two years I I trying to make a change and difference in my life. I am going to be fabulous, and lead a life worthy of standing back and watching.

Cathartic Ella going deep.