Week 12

Dear Reader,

It has been a hot minute.

The last we spoke, I had this grand plan, this deadline, a goal, an orientation for the unravelling in my life.

And yet here we are, a month later. There is nothing more to say other than we found lockdown again.

Does anyone else find lockdown causes them to feel like time has stopped? It’s like calories don’t count and life trajectory is on pause as I navigate trying to fill an 8 hour day.

But the time still ticks. The hours still pass. You can’t stop time actually occurring and life continuing to slip away just because the luxuries of being outside don’t exist.

Sometimes I think I run away with the everyday mundane activities because my brain is still not ready to face my problems or to make the change. Commitment is hard.

And so, I will continue to try, and fail, to try again and to write when my mind is clear enough to communicate for my future self who will read this one day and likely think why did I wait to start.

Yours always,

Cathartic-Ella